All Sorts of New Fun

Dear Elijah,
I can't sleep!!! I've been up since 4am, and now it's 5am, and I decided to write to you since my mind keeps racing and won;t let me go back to sleep! Well, the 4th of July was fun :) We had a bbq at Grandma and Grandpa's house. Your daddy and I made a red white ad blue cheesecake, and your great aunt Teresa made a red, white, and blue carrot cake! Grandma cut up watermelon, and made corn on the cob, hamburgers, and all kinds of other yummy stuff! Then later that evening we all drove to Malaga Cove, (the cliffs) and watched the firework show that they had going on there! It was so much fun! At the bbq you warmed up to mostly everyone, and started rough housing (wrestling) with your uncle C.J. It was hilarious! When you get in that mood, you want to keep on wrestling, and you start to pick a fight with whoever will get down on the floor and roll around with you! It so cute! You went up to your cousin Nic, but he didn't want to play fight because he was busy playing a video game. You kept on tickling him, and them tried to bear hug him. You wanted to wrestle with him so bad, but he wasn't having it at that moment, so you went onto the next person who was your auntie Erica. Hahaha... You walked up to her and basically squealed at her, and pushed her playfully as if to say, "Ok, come on, try to get me!" haha... So she was a good sport and started playing with you. She was even in a dress and was keeping up with you  just fine. Hahaha... Then you picked a fight with mommy. I was sitting on the floor and you ran up to me and bear hugged me trying to tackle me to the floor. There is only so much wrestling mommy can do now though since I'm 9 months pregnant with your little sister! Hahahaha... But I do enjoy it ;)I like how fun you are! I love how you play...

You are starting to venture off on your own more these days, and are getting a bit more independent. It takes you a shorter time to warm up to places and people now, and then when you do, you stop clinging to mommy and daddy like you used to do, and you have started to roam around and explore other areas and people. It's pretty fun to watch, and notice the changes you are going through. The other night at our home group, you were roaming around, kind of following one of the little girls in our group, and you were holding two maracas... Lydia wanted to play with one of them, and you were holding tight to both of them! It was the first time I ever witnessed you not wanting to share! Hahahahaha, and I don;t know why I found it so funny! You r reaction to sharing one of your maracas was first, holding on tightly and shaking your head "no," and then letting out a loud scream when Lydia was trying to obtain the other one. Hahahaha. THEN, when her mommy and I were trying to talk you through the concept of "sharing," you growled at us! You have learned to growl from the doggie you are always around. He growls at you when you are trying to snuggle with him, so you do it too. It was quite funny, and eventually you parted with one of your moroccas... I just thought it was a funny little change I witnessed. We may have entered a whole new stage where sharing is not your strong point anymore. You have developed a mind of your own ;) heehee

For the past two weeks or so you have been giving us a hard time about eating! This has never been a problem for you, but now getting you to eat is one of the hardest things! You cry through most of it, and we have to sit there with you for a long time trying to get you to open your mouth. You usually do open up for us, and you rarely spit stuff out, (although you do that sometimes), once we get it in your mouth, you are good about chewing and swallowing. It's just sad because you cry through the whole thing. You would seriously LIVE off of berries and cheese if we let you, but we are trying to make sure you are getting everything your little body needs to be a healthy boy. You fight us on oatmeal, sweet potatoes, beans, most veggies and things of that nature, but will happily, on your own eat strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, watermelon, and cheese! You really like berries and cheese! It's crazy to see this because you have grown up on my homemade baby food, and would eat spinach, carrots, broccoli, avocado, zucchini, and much more. I would think you would get used to the tastes. But it's almost like the taste is the least of the problem. I think you may just not want to give up play time to eat, You would always rather be doing something else. Oh well, we'll see how things progress :)

I woke up last night as well, but that was more because I feel like I was supposed to be praying for people God was putting on my heart. So I prayed for a solid hour for you, your daddy, Emma, our housing situation, a random girl I came in contact with a few times when I was volunteering at a church, and some others. I do like when I wake up with specific things and people to pray for, but also, the lack of sleep left me pretty wiped out today, and now again this morning I know this day holds a lot of tiredness for me too! I have to wake up more these days to go to the bathroom since your little sister is in my tummy, and since I'm up so often, my mind will just start to race about all kinds of things and I can't seem to shut it off! So here I am, not sleeping, and yes, I will be very tired today, but at least I got to write you a letter :) That's a big plus! I love you more than words can express. I enjoy watching you, playing with you, kissing you, hugging you, and just being your mommy! It's the best fun ever getting to take care of you and watch you grow and change. You are the sweetest, cutest, so brave, ultra smart, most fun little guy I have ever had the pleasure of loving! You have such a tenderness matched with your rough and tough ways. You always have time for hugging and kissing and snuggling in between your running, jumping, wrestling, and growling! haha! I love you baby boy! You are my sunshine! :)

Giving daddy kisses :)

Morning snuggle time with your daddy :)

One of my favorites right now. This was about a week ago when we set up the pool for you out on the balcony :)

Yelling!!! Ugh...

Dear Elijah,
I yelled at you for the very first time Ever the other day, and let me tell you... It was so lame! I was overwhelmed, and super stressed out about something that was going on other than what you were doing, and so when you were just being a normal baby boy, I snapped and yelled at you. I could not shake the terrible feeling it gave me for the rest of the day. That night your dad put on a movie and we were lying in bed, and I paused the movie and said, "babe, I seriously feel so sad about yelling at Eli today," then I burst into tears! Your daddy was so sweet, rubbed my head and told me what a great mommy I am. It was just so hard to realize that I hurt your feelings by yelling at you, when you had never experienced mommy doing that before. I know it jolted you, and that's never what I want to do! I could not get the feeling to go away, so we prayed together and talked it out until I felt sure that mommies make mistakes, and I need to take a mental note and move on. It was hard for both you and I, and I know now ESPECIALLY, that I do not ever wish to yell at you, even when I am frustrated, it creates even more stress for the both of us! I always said from the beginning that I plan on never raising my voice to my kids, but yes, as mommies we mess up sometimes and go directly against what we believe is right. I know I can't say it will NEVER happen again, but I do know the consequences are harsh. But yes, I am human, and I will mess up time and time again, but I have the ability to learn from my mistakes as well, and also, most importantly, I have God to help me along the way. I need His grace so much! Man though!!!!!!!!!! Worst night ever! I believe it was a mix of me being super emotional being pregnant with your sister and all, but those feelings were real nevertheless. There are so many opinions, blogs, articles, and teachings on what parenting is the best parenting, and these days we over think parenting sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much that at times it becomes ridiculous! I've seen so many parenting styles and have seen many parents who used different techniques, successfully raise wonderful children :) So I have learned in this short amount of time to research, try things, do what works for me and my baby specifically, and go with my inner (gut) feeling. If it brings me and my household peace, it must be right for us! I have to tell you, I gather from all kinds of information, and my favorite thing to do it think it out, try it out, and then see what works for us. :) It gives me a sense of peace knowing that I am actively responding to you in different ways to figure out what works the best for us. So Eli, when you are older, you can tell me what you didn't agree with and will not be using with your own children ;) haha Yelling makes us all feel bad, therefore, I'm going to try my hardest to keep that away... Now when you are older and reading this letter, please don't show it to me with a tally at the bottom of how many times I have yelled at you!!! hahahahaha! At least you know that I care about your feelings, and would feel bad after ;) haha... I love you so much Elijah! You are such a sunshine, sweet pea, baby face, cute head! I love your kisses, your hugs, your snuggles, and your love.
By the way, you LOVE trash cans. It's so funny! Every time we go for a walk, I have to let you walk up to every trash can along the way. You point to it with a HUGE smile, and say in a very sweet high pitch voice, "trash can!" It's so cute, and whenever you spot one anywhere, you get so excited and say trash can loudly. We brought you to see the seals the other day, and you liked them enough, but then you spotted a trash can there, and your excitement escalated 10 times! Hahahaha...

SLUGGER!

Dear Elijah,
You little slugger! You got mommy and daddy good tonight! We were at our bible study group and it was getting late so we decided to leave and get you to bed. I had to put you down outside on the sidewalk to look for our car keys, and when I went to pick you back up, you looked like you were reaching for something, and you actually got mad at me for picking you up. I turned you towards me, you hugged me around the neck, and then I handed you off to daddy. Your dad and I were driving down the street we are going to be living on soon, and I thought I spotted something outside the house, so your dad decided to do a U turn to make sure all was well. Meanwhile I felt something slimy and wet fall onto my arm, and I immediately thought it was banana since you were eating it earlier. I wasn't sure, but I was assuming that was the only logical thing. So I said to your dad, "eew, something wet and slimy is on my arm, and I can't see because it's dark..." So I proceeded to wipe it off and I for some strange reason of my own, I put it on your daddy's hand so that he might determine what it was. Really I was being facetious, because I thought it was banana, and thought it was funny to wipe it on him. I happened to flash the cell phone light in his direction and we both saw a slimy SLUG just chillin' on your dad's hand!!!! He was in the middle of a U turn, and almost crashed our new car trying to get it off... He called me by my first name, which made me laugh hysterically to tears! I laughed so hard, and he exclaimed, "Honey! I was making a U turn! That's like the most dangerous time to put a slug on somebody!!!" Looking back I can see how you may have been reaching for the slug when I put you down, and then when you hugged me, you got it in my hair! That's the only way I can figure it getting into my hair to suddenly drop onto my arm in the car! Oh Elijah, you bring so much laughter and excitement to our lives. We love you slugger ;) heehee

I'm a Mommy! That's Pretty Sweet!

Dear Elijah,
Tomorrow is Mothers Day... All I can think about is how much I love and adore you! You are a ray of sunshine in our lives and I couldn't picture my life without you. I watch you grow every day, and see what a sweet hearted little baby boy you are. You wave at people we walk by, you smile, you kiss and you hug. You are such a shy guy until you warm up, and then your personality just pops! I love how shy you act sometimes because it's just too cute :) When I look at you I see an innocent, sweet, loving, fun, active little boy who thinks everyone is here to play with him. haha! It's crazy to me how much you are your own person, and have your own ways and quirks that you did not learn from daddy or me. I can't wait to see the man you grow up to be. We are super in love with you, and we tear up at everything! If you do new things, or show a softer side your dad and I just melt. It's hard for me sometimes to imagine you grown up, so I just don't do it often, because I am enjoying this time right now. This sweet baby time where you are so vulnerable and need lots of love and care. I pray all mommies get to experience the joys of motherhood, I pray that all mommies get to see their little miracles grow, I pray that all mommies would find the energy they need to enjoy even the tougher times, and I pray that all mommies would see their babies as thee most wonderful gifts from God. All babies are special, priceless gifts from God and deserve the best kind of care and love that we are able to give as parents. It's so great to have a God who loves you more than I do, and who is always watching over us, and filling our lives with His goodness and grace. I personally need His grace and mercy on a day to day basis. Just as our Father in heaven wants us to give us blessings and good gifts and wants the best for us, I also want my precious baby boy to to be filled with joy, and love everyday! I want the best for you, and I want you to feel completely loved by God, by us and by the people we bring into your life. You are blessed with a wonderful family who loves you very much. I am so humbled by Gods faithfulness, and I know that God has given so many great blessing to those around us as well. I love to see other people around us experiencing God's blessings. I love to see joyful families who love their gifts from God. It brings me so much joy to see a sparkle in another mommies eye when she looks at her baby! It's just good to know that there are babies around us receiving so much love. Us mommies are pretty blessed. I am so humbled and blessed to get to have this roll in life. I LOVE YOU AND EMMA SO MUCH! Thanks for making me a proud mama!

So Fun!

Dear Elijah,
Man, I'm so sorry I have been slacking on your letters. You have been keeping me busy along with so many other things! I love you, and I NEED to share with you what you have been doing the past few weeks!
First, you said, "I love you," on April 27th I believe, or at least a day before or after that ;) Haha, and you say mama and dada ,baba, and these past two days have been really trying to say what you hear me say. I sang, "pop goes the Wiesel," and you tried to mimic that, which was so cute! So basically you have just entered the stage of mimicking what we are saying. You get shy about it, and hide your face, or smile and turn away. It's pretty funny! You give kisses WAY better now, and you are officially a climber! You will grab me by the back of the neck and kiss me over and over and over again with your very serious "kiss face." I eat it up, and love those moments. If we ask you for a kiss now, you know exactly what we mean. Now about your being a climber, I walked out of the room a few days ago, and when I walked back in, you were standing on top of your firetruck just smiling. You didn't know how to get down, but you did know how to climb up. You have tried to climb over the gates we have up to keep you out of unsafe (un-baby proofed) area's, and you are getting really brave with trying to climb on just about anything now. I knew this was coming because I have been trying to teach you how to safely climb on and off the couch, but you had never attempted that without me until the past week or so. Lot's of falls lately, and bumping your head. You are getting hurt a lot more now since you are venturing off to try new things :) You say bye bye now when you wave sometimes, and today you said grandpa pretty clearly. :) You LOVE to wrestle, and when me or daddy get on the floor with you, you get this twinkle in your eye, and then start to want to wrestle with us. It's too funny! You jump on us, grab up, climb on us, and it's all so much fun! You REALLY like to stand behind me while holding onto my hair, and laugh while I turn to try and see you, and you move just enough behind me so that I can't fully see you. It's like your favorite game with mommy! Hahaha... You hide behind me essentially, and think it's funny when I try to turn and see you! With daddy, you will walk up behind him, and he quickly turns around and says, "I'm gonna get you," and then you scream and run as fast as you can in the other direction. So cute! You are still sleeping through the night, and waking happy. You like to point to everything right when we take you out of your crib. You point first to the eagle on grandpa's safe, then to the lock, then to the deer on the wall, then to anything and everything that you can see. It's so funny! When you point at something, it means you want us to say what it is.

So your daddy and I had planned a trip for our TWO YEAR wedding anniversary, and the trip was this last weekend! It was SO MUCH FUN! What is so funny to me is that we planned on going up to Palm Springs the first day and night alone (meaning without you) and having you stay with grandma and grandpa. The next day Auntie Melissa and Megan would drive you up to us, and stay the next night with us. Great plan until it got closer to that actual moment when I realized I was going to have to leave you over night!!! I mean it sounded nice from afar that your daddy and I would spend some time alone first and then have you join us, but when it got closer, I panicked and almost changed our plans completely! Hahahaha... I just could not imagine leaving you that long, and being that far away from you as well!!! So I told your dad, I didn't know if I could do it, and he was very understanding and just said, "Ok babe, we'll pray about it, and when the time comes, if we don;t feel comfortable, we'll just take him with us the first night, but still have your sister and Megan come up the next day!" I was so relieved that there was no pressure in leaving you the first night, and after praying for days, and then talking to your auntie, I decided I would be ok :) I think it was because everyone was so understanding and put no pressure on me, that I felt like I could be at peace with it. So your daddy and I took off as planned on Friday, and you came to us Saturday afternoon around 1pm. Your dad and I really did have a blessed time together. We did so many fun things, and it makes me all giggly just thinking about the time we had together. We hung out, talked, swam, went to dinner, had hot cocoa and coffee by the fireplace, watched a movie late at night, and just enjoyed each other's company! Funny thing was that we talked about you a lot, and both missed you! We kept say things like, "Oh Eli would just love that!" Hahaha... Saturday morning I text my sister super early telling her how excited I was that she was bringing you to us that day! I was so excited to get to see you! I called Megan around the time I thought you guys might be semi close, and she said you guys were 13 minutes away, and I started crying! Hahahahahahahahaha! I totally teared up, and then told her, "Don't make fun of me for crying when I see him!" And she said, "I'll probably be crying right along with you just from seeing you cry!" Hahahahaha... Then I hung up and your daddy was looking at me smiling, and I said, "Babe! I can't help it! Why aren't you crying???!" and he replied, "Because I get to see him very soon!" Haha... At least one of us can hold it together. When you arrived at 1pm, I walked outside to greet you! Nina was holding you, and you had just woken up. You smiled when you saw me, and I grabbed you up and hugged and kissed you! It was the best moment! We immediately got you all geared up and in the pool and you had the best time! You loved the water, and wanted to be in the pool the whole time! The shower there was so huge and really cool, so before we all went out to dinner that night, your daddy, you and I all took a shower together. You were splashing around in the huge bath tub, and we were singing your favorite song while you stomped your little feet splashing in the water! It was thee cutest thing I had ever experienced! Since the bath tub was filled with about 2 inches of water from the shower running, it was perfect for you to splash in. We are talking, this was like a four foot wide, and 10 feet deep shower/bath, so it was basically a wet playground for you! Haha. Can't wait to go back someday when you are a bit older and Emma is here! Sooooooo, the entire trip was amazing, and such a fun time for all of us. It came time to leave, and your daddy and I decided after check out, we would hang out on the Palm Springs strip for a while before leaving to go home. We got to Starbucks, and were hanging out there with our drinks while you walked around saying hi to everyone :) Then as we took off to walk the strip, you became interested in the marble tiles along the sidewalk. You kept pointing to them as we passed every single one. It was so cute. I walked ahead for a moment to capture pictures of you and daddy walking side by side on the strip, and then you fell on one of the marble tiles, and when you touched down to get up, it was so hot that it burned your hands!!! It also burned one of your legs a bit. I was far, but your daddy grabbed you up as fast as he could, and your hands were already burned and starting to turn red! We didn;t know how bad it was until you started crying uncontrollably, and there was NOTHING we could do to calm you down. You were crying so hard that it scared me! You were not breathing right, and your face was completely red. We poured water on your hands, and grabbed an ice cube from our ice chest. As we sat in the air-conditioned car, we finally decided that there was nothing we could do to get you to stop screaming, so your dad decided that we had to go to the ER. If only to get you some sort of relief! We got there and you were still screaming and beside yourself. They got you in right away to evaluate your burns, and by then they had blistered. Thankfully they said they were minor, and we didn't have to worry. They took your temp, and all that jazz and then sent us to the waiting room to await a room visit. They finally called us in and by this time your nina had rushed over. We all went it, and as they looked at your blisters they decided not to wrap them, but just to give you an ice pack and some Motrin for the pain! I was fine with that. Anything to ease the pain, and get you to calm down. They gave you medicine, and soon after that, you stopped crying, and feel asleep in my arms. I was crying for a lot of the time just because I was so overwhelmed with everything! I hated to see you in pain, I felt bad that it happened in the first place, and I was feeling defeated since I was so helpless to bring you comfort! So all of our tears stopped and we were able to get on the road back home. Today one of your big blisters burst, and you didn;t seem to mind. You have been very good about the whole healing process, and they don;t seem to be bothering you much! Thank Jesus! We had lots of people praying for you :) Love you!

Happy First Birthday Baby Boy!!!

Dear Elijah,
You are so cute, lets just start with that... This is a letter to tell you how much you have enriched our lives this past year! You are a bundle of fun, sweetness, gentleness, smiles, laughs, cry's, snuggles, kisses, and sweet sounds! You have been such a joy in our lives, and have made daddy to day living so much fun, crazy, and sometimes down right chaotic, and we wouldn't change it for anything! You are such a smart little ONE year old Elijah. You pay attention to many details, you can color, you can look at books, you can walk, run, and kick a ball around. You can determine what is not ok to do, and what you are allowed to do. You communicate by making loud sounds, grunts, pointing, or taking hold of our hand and leading us to where you want us. You wave hello and goodbye, you clap, and you throw your hands up in the air when you want to celebrate or are proud of yourself for an accomplishment. You can put your shapes in the correct holes with little help from us, and you go down for naps very well. You sleep through the night, and you enjoy dancing so much! You dance all the time throughout the day. You love the ABC song ;) You also enjoy all of Jana's songs. We haven;t quite started showing you videos, or TV show, but when you do catch something on TV that mommy and daddy are watching, you pay attention to clapping, singing or music that comes on, otherwise, you would rather be playing with your toys.
We threw you a fun Jungle Party! The party was so much fun for mommy and daddy to plan and put together for our special little you! We set up a candy bar, a chocolate fountain, and made Jungle Juice ;) Hahaha... We baked banana cupcakes, and muffins, and also made you a MOnkey cake! W made most of the decorations ourselves, and one night my friend Stacy even ca,e over to help cut little flags out for you. Since your party was one day after our friends wedding, we were pretty busy! We ordered PIZZA!!! Your auntie Tiff and Grandma Diane made fruit salads, and your great aunt Teresa made a HUGE green salad! Your grandma Darcie and grandpa Dean brought lots of beverages, and your grandpa Cruz and grandma Patty brought homemade salsa. Your Nina's friend made another monkey cake that was chocolate with a banana cream filling. Since you can't have much sweets and chocolate isn't the best for you right now, I made you a monkey cake made from banana's and apple sauce with less sugar. You really liked it! Elijah, I can not even believe how good you were for your first birthday party!You were such a little ball of joy, and running around playing with your cousins and friends. You are pretty shy and clingy, but you did great wondering around and being a bit more social. You weren't cranky, you enjoyed the day, and you loved playing with all your presents after opening them. Your daddy and I were so blessed and blown away by all our friends and family who came to celebrate with us! We are so thankful for every single person who was at that party! It's so nice to have so many kind people who love you and us in our lives! We had fun naming all your candy jungle themed names. Hahahaha... Our favorite quote from your party was a kid asking, "mom, can I please have some exotic parrot poop?" Hahahahahahahahaha... That was our name for M&M's... heehee... We love you babe. We thank Jesus every day for you. Our lives are super duper fun with you around ;) Happy First Birthday Elijah.

Strong Willed Blessing...

Dearest Elijah James,
You mean so much to me. Lately you have been acting different, and showing me new challenges. I am so pleased to say that I actually appreciate this new season. You have been testing us more and more, which includes screaming, fits, running away from us, and all that fun stuff ;) I have to say that for a few days this was bothering me and I was at a loss on how exactly to tackle this. I didn't know how to show you what was positive behavior and what was not. You are not even 1 year old yet, and you are already walking, exploring, and trying to figure out your boundaries. It's harder right now because you can't talk, and do not know how to communicate what you want to us. All you know is that if you scream, we react. So why wouldn't you scream? You learned that by trying it out, and it sort of got you eventually to what you thought you wanted. Here is the difficulty. We are learning too! Hahaha... The contrast to this is that you are the sweetest, most tender hearted baby boy! You always want to show us love, kiss and hug, and snuggle. You are always worried if we are hurt, and always smile at us to let us know you are happy! You love to look us right in the eyes and smile. If we aren't looking at you, you will run up into our face just to smile, and then you go on with whatever you were doing. You are very cautious as well. It takes you a long time to warm up to other people. At first I was a bit tense with this because I didn't want people to think you didn't like them, but now I am actually touched by it. It shows me that you feel safe with mommy and daddy, and little by little on your own time, you eventually let others hold you or play with you. I've grown to really adore that about you. You are so cute and timid at first in front of others, but I get to see the crazy, loud, run around the house laughing Elijah that I love so dearly. You have sides only shown to mommy and daddy, and I treasure those fun moments we all get to share together. You like to share, I have never once seen you take something from another baby, or scream at another baby around you. You usually just give what you have to other little ones who take it from you. You have not yet entered the stage of "mine!" but are more hurt by us taking something from you. You get sad, and start to cry, but you don't fight to get it back. So, here we are, a walking, eager, curious not yet 1 year old trying to test the boundaries. At first the issue was trying to remain consistent. I was actually slacking on this because I had other factors. Since we live with your grandparents right now, it was hard for me to let you cry when you needed to. There are times when I believe it's necessary to let you cry it out. For instance when you are repeatedly trying to do something you are not supposed to be doing, and I am repeatedly having to remove you from the place you so desperately want to be, like, the toilet, or the trash can. hahaAaaaaah, so sweet and innocent you are! I love you more than words could EVER express.