I Can Balance a Cup!

Dear Elijah,
You mommy can now balance a cup on her tummy! It's so cool. I've always wanted to do that. Your daddy walked into your grandma and grandpa Holland's living room and caught me sitting in your grandpas big brown chair with a cup on my belly. Yeah, that's the big news for this week!!! Oh yeah, and we asked your Auntie Melissa and Uncle Cruz to be your Nina and Nino... No big deal... Just kidding! It is a big deal! On Christmas Eve we asked these two awesome people to be a big part of your life :) You will see how cool they are when you're older, haha. They have always been there for your mommy, and I know they will do the same for you. They are loyal, protective, sweet, fun and have a great sense of style. Hahaha... Ok we really chose them because they have leather jackets just like you, your daddy and I do. I mean, that's pretty important! They also like boots, and scarfs like you will too one day. Hahahaha! Anyway, Elijah, it's a pretty important thing in our family to choose God Parents. They become a big part of your life, and are people that your daddy and I can  have beside us. I know every one in the family will be a part of your life, and that we will have many people standing beside us encouraging us as a family along the way. Your Nina and Nino just have to now! haha
This Christmas was so great Eli. I can't wait till you can actually be here with us to celebrate Jesus' Birthday! It was so fun seeing all of our families. It was your your dad and mines first Christmas together as a married couple, and he surprised me with a beautiful necklace from Tiffany's. I got him some hiking boots he has been wanting for such a long time. It reminded me of how your daddy still sees me as a jewel, and still wants to make me smile every day. He makes me feel like a princess! I got him boots because he is such a guy in the good sense. He is all man to me, and I see how he takes care of this family, and feel like we could not be in better hands. Your daddy thinks long and hard about things, and prays about things without even saying much sometimes. Then he lets me know his ideas, and how God has been speaking to him. While we were down here this time, he has been hunting around for places to live, making calls, taking appointments, and driving us around town searching for a place he would want us all to live. So Elijah, we may have seen the place us three will become a family in! :) But who knows, we have other places to see still. Your daddy says "I love you Elijah!" Over and out :)

Dear Elijah,
So far our first married Christmas together has been amazing! I'm telling you, we have the best families ever :) We took off from Seattle to California on the 17th of December, and had a pretty good flight. The only problem we had was when we were in the air, mommy got sick and put that barf bag to good use. Yuck! But I was so happy that your daddy was there to comfort me. I told him, I would have been so nervous and sad if he were not there to rub my back and head while I was getting sick. After that, everything was smooth sailing! The first fun thing we got to do was have a slumber party at Grandma and Grandpa Holland's house with your Uncle Jimmy, Auntie Tiffany, and cousins Grace, Katelynne and Hannah! It was so fun. Your cousins are so cute and it was fun to get to spend so much time with everyone :) The next night was your cousin in-law Erica's Birthday, so we went out to a karaoke place to see her, and celebrate. Today, we got to spy on you and see you in 4D at First Look Sonograms in Redondo Beach! It was amazing!!! You were so cute and active, The lady said that you were so cute and the best baby in a long time that she had taken video of. She said you were cooperating so well, and that she was amazed by how much you were showing off for the ultrasound. Haha, eli, you little ham! You cried, smiled, yawned, swallowed, and sucked your fingers the whole time! It was so amazing to see. I'm still on a high from the experience! I can't wait to meet you. So far this week, your daddy has felt you kick, along with your grandma Darcie, Your grandma Diane, and your Auntie Tiff. More to come hopefully! I know your Auntie Melissa, and Uncle C.J. want to feel you too :) I'm so in love with you baby. I could not stop staring at your pictures after the ultrasound! They said everything looks great! You are doing good, and exactly where you should be in terms of growing and developing. PRAISE GOD! We got prayer for you yesterday at church, and continue to pray for you every day! Sue and Tobiah Scott prayed for you, and you were moving around as they prayed over you, your dad, and I. We are blessed to have so many caring and Godly people in our lives who are ready and willing to pray for us :)

Love this place...

Dear Eli,
Your grandpa & grandma Holland, and your great uncle John came to Seattle today and we got to see them for lunch! It was really nice seeing them, even if it was just for a little while. They are up visiting your great-grandpa John File. When we were walking to lunch here on Capitol Hill, it was fun to see all the different stores and restaurants we live next to. This is such a fun place to live, and when you get older we would love to bring you to our old neighborhood. Who knows if the building we live in will still be standing by that time, because it's so old. It was built in the 1920's and has that old world charm. The elevator is labeled (shaft-way), and it has a regular door that you open, and then a gate that you open to get inside. Then you close the door, and the gate, and press the button you want! It's awesome to your dad and I, and scary to others. You are growing still very steadily. Here are some pics Your daddy just took of you and I. Love you.

indescribable...

Eli,
Sometimes there are those moments that are so clear, so real and make the life we live so worth living. These moments can produce deep thinking, tears, laughs, or a huge revelation. They always happen to me in the most interesting times. Elijah, when I first knew that I was going to marry your daddy I wasn't even in deep thought, or praying, or really doing much at all. I was driving down 6th Street in San Pedro, alone in my little red honda right before Broadway, and it hit me! I just knew he was going to be the man I spent the rest of my life with. I have NEVER had such a clear confirmation like that before. I remember not only knowing, but then getting butterflies in my tummy just thinking about him. Up until that point I had never been sure about marriage. It was such an awesome experience. Your daddy knew WAY before I did, haha, but I caught on eventually :) Here and there these moments catch me off guard... Last night I was lying in bed and all of the sudden I realized that I was going to be a MOM!!! haha... I know this realization probably sounds funny to you since I am 5 and a half months prego with you already, but it's true. I could not sleep because it became so real to me that I was going to be taking on a huge responsibility, and that our lives were about to change so much. Of course it is a very welcomed change my love, but it can be intimidating. My revelation was this, I am so in love with you already and only want to do right by you. I know that I am going to do so many things wrong though, and so I really needed to use that time to pray for grace in mine and your dad's parenting. Also, I had to acknowledge the fact that I am not alone in this. I have your daddy, I have Jesus, and I have terrific family and friends. I have confidence that your daddy and I are going to be the best that we know how to be, and also that we are seeking the right guidance. I'm excited to be a mommy! I can't wait to see my husband become a daddy! Sooooooooo, tonight your dad and I were spending some quality time together, which thankfully we get to have a lot of, and I had a moment of such truth. I almost cried, but I held it together and was able to appreciate what we have. This time (moment) that we shared tonight was so powerful it made me see and know that there is no one else in the entire world that I could ever share that crazy special moment with. I felt lucky, blessed, happy, thankful, blissful, and completely overwhelmed all at the same time! It was so indescribable. I'm trying to put it into words but I can't! haha, and you would never think that us being silly, laughing and being goofy together would ever produce such a revelation. But it's true Eli, sometimes there are those special people God is good enough to put in your life that you can never replace. God has blessed us with each other, and now with YOU! We get to share our love with you now, which makes things even sweeter. It's going to be hard at times, and we are going to be so tired at times, but I know that God will see us through, and continue to bless us with love, grace and moments of joy that we will remember forever! yay!!! Eli I can't wait to meet you!!!

Getting so big!

Well Elijah,
Today mommy had to go get some Coco Butter for my growing tummy! My tummy is starting to feel a little itchy since you are growing so big now. I feel you all the time now. You have your little moments when you kick mommy a lot, and if your daddy is around, he always demands to feel my tummy while you are on the move. It always makes me tear up when he talks to you , and gets excited to feel you kick. I always try to hide my tears of joy and pretend that I'm not that emotional! haha. Last night your dad read you the night before Christmas. He happened to have it handy and wanted to read to you while you were awake and moving around. I believe you liked it because you would not stop moving around while you were hearing your daddy's voice :) We are at 22 weeks this Sunday. I can't believe it's already been 5 and a half months! I never thought my stomach would get this big, and it's only going to get bigger! People still don't notice I'm pregnant when I'm out and about in public since here in Seattle I'm always wearing layers of clothes and jackets, but when the jackets come off, I have never felt more conscience of my ever growing belly! haha. Everyone feels the need to look at my belly and then give me a look. It's either an "aww, how sweet" look, or a "How old are you" look... haha. I think some people still think I'm about 16 years old. I love praying for you Eli. I pray for you throughout my whole day. You and your daddy! Every time your daddy leaves the house I pray for him and tell him the same thing... "Look twice for good measure, and once more for me ;)... Don't talk to strangers, and make wise decisions... Listen to Jesus, I love you and need you very much, so be careful and remember to text me and call me when you have a moment... I'm praying for you babe!" haha. He is a great sport about it. It's just that you two matter so much to me and are the loves of my life! So Eli, when you grow up and are going to be somewhere without me, you can expect to hear that and more from your mama every time. :) My own mama's words to me EVERY TIME I left the house when I lived with her, and to this day are... "Lord bless you and keep you safe, and put his angels around you, and help you to have a good time, love you, bye!" I can hear her perfectly in my head saying it! She does it to your grandpa Dean, Your Uncle Jake, Uncle C.J., Auntie Melissa, and pretty much anyone we bring to the house. haha and now I totally get it! It's nice to know she sends out that prayer for us every time we leave. I know that is a tradition I will carry on in our family Elijah. Love you... Here is a VERY recent picture of you, daddy and mommy getting ready to celebrate our first married Christmas together...